Tonight, the evening of October 31st, will signify the observance of the ancient holiday of “Halloween.” As a historical note, the annual event traditionally celebrates the lives of all of the designated Saints (“All Hallow’s Day”) and reliably features celebrants ubiquitously decked out in holiday costumes and children going door to door asking for candy (“trick or treat”).
(N.B.) This year, based on the Nation’s unprecedented, singularly bizarre events (manifested by the egregious Trump Administration), it is requested that, if possible, the reading of this mini-essay be effectively accompanied by a vocal or mental intonation of Mussorgorsky’s “Night on Bald Mountain.”
It is fortuitous that the protagonist of this year’s celebrated holiday of horrors is appropriately manifested, evidencing orange-colored hair and wielding, as his evil sceptre, a black velvet “sharpie. Tonight’s event will ineluctably feature the the President’s bizarre, menagerie, ” of selected ” yes-men (and”yes-women”), loyally incanting the unverifiable alternate-facts of their puppet master’s reductive and unsupporte declarations.
There will reliably be unprecedented (and unauthorized) fireworks, far exceeding all past holiday celebrations, in the spectacular and deadly bellicose bombing of foreign naval vessels on the high seas, holiday-appropriate property damage in the form of the barbaric and unauthorized destruction of the East Wing of the Nation’s venerable White House, masked holiday revelers in military uniforms, in joyous holiday pursuit of peaceful Hispanic citizens, hearty congratulations of MAGA respecting the jubilent holiday event of the long-awaited denial to the needy non-celebrants (domestic and foreign) of “gratuitious” relief in the form of food and medicine.
The witch’s broom, previously employed by our orange holiday protagonist, has been replaced with a more suitable, ego-appropriate multi-million Jumbo Jet (tactically) donated by a Middle Eastern Autocrat. With the future construction of the orange multi-million dollar ballroom, replacing the savaged East Wing of the White House, all will be a it should be.
What a truly magnificent MAGA Holiday Celebration!!
-p.
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